The holidays bring families together, and knowing How to Help Your Parents with Their Tech Over the Holidays can be very beneficial to set them up throughout the year.
The inevitable “Can you help me with my phone?” requests from parents and grandparents. While you’re home for the festivities, you have a golden opportunity to set up your parents with technology solutions that will actually stick throughout the year.
This comprehensive guide will walk you through everything you need to know about helping your parents with their tech over the holidays. You’ll learn practical strategies for teaching technology concepts, specific problems to address, how to create lasting solutions, and ways to make tech support a positive bonding experience rather than a frustrating chore. Whether your parents struggle with basic smartphone functions or want to learn video calling to stay connected with grandchildren, this guide has you covered.
Understanding Why Parents Struggle with Technology
Before diving into solutions, it’s important to understand why many older adults find technology challenging. This isn’t about intelligence or capability. The generation gap in tech comfort stems from fundamental differences in how different age groups were introduced to digital devices.
Most parents and grandparents didn’t grow up with intuitive touchscreens and app-based interfaces. They learned computing, if at all, through command-line systems or early desktop interfaces that required memorizing specific sequences. Modern technology assumes a level of “digital intuition” that comes from years of smartphone use.
Additionally, many older adults fear breaking something expensive. This anxiety prevents them from exploring and learning through trial and error, which is exactly how most people develop tech skills. They’ve also experienced frustrating updates that change familiar interfaces overnight, making them hesitant to trust technology.
Understanding these psychological barriers will help you approach tech support with empathy rather than impatience. Your parents aren’t being difficult; they’re navigating an environment that wasn’t designed with their learning style in mind.
The Benefits of Helping Your Parents Become Tech-Savvy
Investing time to help your parents with their tech over the holidays creates benefits that extend far beyond fixing immediate problems.
Enhanced Communication and Connection
When parents master video calling apps like FaceTime, Zoom, or WhatsApp, they can see grandchildren regularly rather than waiting months between visits. Photo sharing becomes effortless, allowing them to stay updated on family moments in real-time. This digital connection significantly reduces feelings of isolation, especially for parents who live far from their children.
Increased Safety and Security
Tech-literate parents can use smartphone features for emergencies, access telehealth services, and avoid common scams targeting older adults. They can share their location with family members when needed and use medical apps to manage prescriptions and appointments more effectively.
Greater Independence
Parents who understand online banking, shopping, and service booking maintain independence longer. They don’t need to ask for help with routine tasks, which preserves their sense of autonomy and dignity. During winter weather or illness, they can order groceries and medications without leaving home.
Cognitive Engagement
Learning new technology keeps the brain active and engaged. Studies show that older adults who regularly use technology, particularly for communication and learning, experience better cognitive outcomes. Mastering new skills builds confidence that extends into other areas of life.
Entertainment and Enrichment
Understanding streaming services, e-readers, and online content opens up endless entertainment possibilities. Your parents can pursue hobbies, take online courses, listen to audiobooks, and stay informed about topics they care about.
Preparing for Your Holiday Tech Support Sessions
Success requires preparation before you sit down with your parents. Don’t wait until they hand you a malfunctioning device on Christmas morning.
Start the Conversation Early
A week or two before your visit, call or message your parents asking what tech issues they’re experiencing. Make a list of their specific problems and concerns. This allows you to research solutions in advance and download any necessary apps or tools before you arrive.
Set Realistic Expectations
Explain that you’ll be setting aside dedicated time for tech help, perhaps an hour each day during your visit. Frame it positively as a learning opportunity rather than a fix-it session. Let them know that becoming comfortable with technology is a process, not something that happens in a single afternoon.
Gather Your Tools
Bring charging cables compatible with their devices, a portable phone or tablet stand, a notebook for writing instructions, and your own fully charged devices. Having the right equipment prevents technical roadblocks during your teaching sessions.
Create a Distraction-Free Environment
Choose a quiet time when you won’t be interrupted by holiday preparations or other family members. Teach in a well-lit space where your parent can comfortably see the screen. Turn off the TV and minimize other distractions.
Step-by-Step Guide to Common Tech Issues
Let’s address the most frequent technology challenges parents face during the holidays and throughout the year.
Setting Up and Simplifying Smartphones
Most parents own smartphones but use only a fraction of their capabilities. Start with the fundamentals.
Organize the Home Screen
Remove or hide apps your parents don’t use. Group similar apps into folders with clear labels like “Banking,” “Health,” or “Communication.” Place the most frequently used apps on the home screen where they’re immediately visible. On iPhones, you can delete entire home screen pages by holding down an app until everything wiggles, then tapping the dots at the bottom and removing unused pages.
Adjust Accessibility Settings
Increase text size by going to Settings > Display & Brightness > Text Size (iPhone) or Settings > Display > Font Size (Android). Enable bold text for easier reading. Turn on “Reduce Motion” to minimize distracting animations. These small changes dramatically improve usability.
Simplify Notifications
Excessive notifications confuse and overwhelm many older users. Go through Settings > Notifications (iPhone) or Settings > Apps & Notifications (Android) and turn off alerts for everything except essential apps like phone, messages, and perhaps email. This prevents the anxiety-inducing red badge accumulation.
Set Up Emergency Features
Show your parents how to use Emergency SOS features. On newer iPhones, rapidly pressing the side button five times calls emergency services and designated contacts. Android devices have similar features. Add emergency contacts to their phone’s Medical ID section so first responders can reach family members if needed.
Master the Camera
Many parents want to take photos of grandchildren but struggle with their phone camera. Spend time showing them how to switch between photo and video modes, how to zoom properly by pinching rather than using digital zoom before shooting, and how to focus by tapping on the subject. Practice together with real subjects.
Making Video Calls Foolproof
Video calling has become essential for family connection, yet many parents find it intimidating.
Choose One Platform and Master It
Don’t overwhelm your parents by setting up FaceTime, Zoom, WhatsApp, and Skype all at once. Pick the platform most family members use and focus exclusively on that one. Create a shortcut on the home screen labeled with the person’s name, like “Call Sarah on FaceTime.”
Practice Before You Leave
Do several test video calls while you’re still there. Show them how to answer incoming calls by swiping or tapping the green button. Practice placing calls to you from their device. Demonstrate how to mute, turn off video, and end calls. Repetition builds muscle memory.
Address Common Video Call Problems
Teach them to check that their camera isn’t covered and that they’re holding the phone at a flattering angle (slightly above eye level, arm’s length away). Show them how to switch between front and rear cameras. Explain that if they can’t hear, they should check the volume buttons on the side of the phone, not just the on-screen controls.
Create Visual Reminders
Write down the exact steps for making a video call, including which app to open and which button to tap. Attach this reference sheet near where they typically charge their phone.
Mastering Email Without Overwhelm
Email causes significant stress for older adults who receive hundreds of messages including spam, promotions, and scams.
Clean the Inbox
Spend time helping them unsubscribe from promotional emails they never wanted. On iPhone Mail or Gmail, you can select multiple messages at once and delete them in bulk. Archive or file away old messages so they start fresh with a manageable inbox.
Set Up Filters and Folders
Create folders for different categories like “Family,” “Medical,” and “Financial.” Set up filters to automatically sort incoming messages. In Gmail, you can create filters that automatically label and organize emails from specific senders.
Teach Scam Recognition
Show real examples of phishing emails in their inbox. Explain that legitimate banks and government agencies never ask for passwords or social security numbers via email. Teach them to hover over links (on a computer) or long-press links (on mobile) to see the actual destination before clicking. Emphasize that if something seems urgent or too good to be true, it’s probably a scam.
Simplify Email Checking
Many parents stress about constantly checking email. Set up their device to fetch new messages every 30 minutes instead of pushing them instantly. This reduces notification anxiety while ensuring they don’t miss important messages.
Navigating Online Banking Safely
Financial tasks online save time and trips to the bank, but security concerns hold many parents back.
Set Up Banking Apps Together
Download the official app from their bank, not a third-party financial aggregator. Log in together using their existing online banking credentials or help them set up online banking if they haven’t already. Enable biometric login (fingerprint or face recognition) so they don’t need to remember complex passwords for everyday access.
Add Trusted Payees
If they regularly pay certain bills or send money to family members, add those payees to their account now. Walk through the process once together so they understand how to initiate transfers. Many banks allow you to schedule recurring payments, which eliminates the monthly task entirely.
Review Security Features
Enable two-factor authentication for their banking accounts. Set up transaction alerts so they receive text notifications for purchases over a certain amount. This provides both security and peace of mind that they’ll know immediately if something suspicious happens.
Practice Basic Transactions
Have them check their balance, view recent transactions, and make a small payment while you watch. Repetition in a low-stakes environment builds confidence.
Setting Up Streaming Services
Cutting the cable cord or supplementing with streaming saves money and provides better content options, but the interface learning curve stops many parents.
Organize and Simplify
If they have multiple streaming services (Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, Amazon Prime), consider setting up a universal remote or using a streaming device like Roku or Apple TV that provides one interface for everything. Label physical remote buttons with their functions using small stickers or a label maker.
Create Watchlists
Browse together and add shows and movies they’d enjoy to their watchlist. This gives them a starting point rather than facing a overwhelming library of options every time they want to watch something.
Show Navigation Basics
Practice opening apps, browsing categories, searching for specific titles, and controlling playback. Many parents don’t realize they can rewind 10 seconds by pressing a button when they miss dialogue. Show them accessibility features like subtitles and audio descriptions.
Manage Profiles
Set up separate profiles if multiple people use the account. This ensures their recommendations stay relevant and they don’t accidentally continue watching something another family member started.
Tools and Resources Your Parents Actually Need
Having the right tools makes helping your parents with their tech over the holidays much more effective.
Password Manager
Services like 1Password, LastPass, or Bitwarden solve the password problem that plagues most older adults. Instead of remembering dozens of complex passwords or writing them in a notebook by their computer, they remember one master password that unlocks everything else. Modern password managers sync across devices and can autofill login credentials.
Set up a password manager together and spend time adding their most important accounts. Show them how to use it on both their phone and computer. The initial time investment pays dividends in reduced frustration and improved security.
Remote Access Software
Tools like TeamViewer, Chrome Remote Desktop, or AnyDesk allow you to see and control your parent’s device from your own home. This is invaluable for troubleshooting when you’re not physically present. You can walk them through problems or simply fix things yourself while talking on the phone.
Install this before you leave and practice using it together so they’re comfortable giving you access when needed. Explain that you can only connect when they approve it, so there’s no privacy concern.
Tech Support Resources
Bookmark helpful websites on their devices. The official Apple Support and Google Support sites have excellent troubleshooting guides and video tutorials. For specific apps, bookmark the help sections. Create a list of trusted tech support numbers, including their internet service provider and device manufacturer.
Physical Accessories
Consider gifting practical accessories like a tablet stand for video calls, a stylus for more precise touchscreen control, blue light blocking glasses for extended screen time, or a wireless charger that’s easier to use than fumbling with cables. These items improve the daily experience of using technology.
Common Challenges and Expert Solutions
Even with preparation, you’ll encounter obstacles when helping your parents with their tech over the holidays. Here’s how to handle them.
Challenge: They Forget Everything You Taught Them
This is the most common frustration. You spend an hour teaching something, and a week later they’ve completely forgotten.
Solution: Create custom reference guides with screenshots. Use your phone to photograph each step of a process as you demonstrate it. Paste these photos into a document with simple captions. Print it in large text and store it near their device. Video record yourself performing tasks on their device, using narration to explain each step. Save these videos to their phone in an easily accessible album called “Tech Help.”
Challenge: They’re Afraid to Try Things Alone
Many parents won’t experiment with technology because they fear breaking something or making an expensive mistake.
Solution: Repeatedly emphasize that it’s nearly impossible to break a phone or tablet by tapping the wrong button. Explain that almost any mistake can be undone. Show them how to force-close an app if something goes wrong. Practice making intentional “mistakes” together and fixing them so they see that errors aren’t catastrophic.
Challenge: Updates Change Everything
Just when they’ve learned where everything is, an operating system update moves features around.
Solution: Show them how to delay non-critical updates. While keeping devices updated is important for security, you can often postpone updates for several weeks. Teach them to call you before installing major updates so you can walk them through any interface changes. Enable automatic updates for apps in the background so they happen transparently without requiring decisions.
Challenge: They Get Frustrated and Want to Give Up
Learning new technology genuinely feels overwhelming, especially when interfaces aren’t intuitive.
Solution: Take breaks before frustration peaks. Celebrate small victories enthusiastically. If they successfully send a text message with a photo attached, that’s genuinely impressive and worth acknowledging. Break complex tasks into tiny steps across multiple sessions rather than trying to teach everything at once. Your patience and encouragement matter more than the technology itself.
Challenge: They Ask the Same Questions Repeatedly
You’ve explained how to attach a photo to a text message five times, but they still can’t do it independently.
Solution: This isn’t about memory or intelligence; it’s about building procedural memory through repetition. Have them perform the task while explaining the steps back to you. This active learning works better than passive watching. Use consistent language each time you explain. If you say “tap the plus button” one time and “press the icon with the plus sign” another time, it confuses the pattern recognition they’re building.
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Advanced Tips for Making Tech Support Easier Long-Term
Once you’ve addressed immediate issues, these strategies create sustainable solutions.
Set Up Family Tech Support
Create a family group chat or shared note where any family member can answer tech questions. Your sibling across the country might be available when you’re not. Having multiple people who can help reduces the pressure on any single family member.
Consider scheduling regular monthly video calls specifically for tech questions. Knowing they have dedicated support time reduces anxiety about bothering you with “small” issues that end up becoming bigger problems.
Leverage Built-In Tutorials
Modern devices have excellent built-in help features. Apple devices have Tips apps with guided tutorials. Android has similar help content. Bookmark or add these apps to the home screen so your parents can learn at their own pace.
Encourage them to use voice assistants for questions. “Hey Siri, how do I add a contact?” or “Ok Google, how do I take a screenshot?” often provides clear, step-by-step instructions.
Connect Them with Peer Learning
Many communities offer technology classes specifically for seniors at libraries, community centers, or senior centers. Learning alongside peers facing similar challenges feels less intimidating than asking younger family members for help. The pace is slower, and instructors expect questions that might seem “basic.”
Some areas have programs where volunteers provide one-on-one tech support to older adults. Search for “senior tech support” plus your parents’ city to find local resources.
Simplify Their Tech Ecosystem
If possible, consolidate devices to a single ecosystem (all Apple or all Android/Google). This reduces the cognitive load of learning different interfaces. Settings and features work similarly across devices, and troubleshooting becomes more straightforward.
Consider whether they actually need every device. Some parents might be happier with just a smartphone and a laptop, eliminating the tablet that sits unused and confusing.
Document Common Tasks
Create a simple tech manual specific to their devices and needs. Include sections on making calls, sending photos, checking email, paying bills online, and using streaming services. Use large fonts, clear screenshots from their actual devices, and simple language. Put it in a three-ring binder so you can update pages as needed.
Frequently Asked Questions About Helping Parents with Technology
How much time should I dedicate to tech support during the holidays?
Plan for 30-60 minutes daily spread across your visit rather than one marathon session. Short, focused sessions with breaks prevent frustration and improve retention. Three 45-minute sessions over several days work better than one 3-hour session.
What if my parents refuse to learn new technology?
Respect their autonomy while emphasizing benefits that matter to them personally. If they don’t care about social media, don’t push it. But if they want to see grandchildren more often, frame video calling as the solution to that specific desire. Sometimes arranging one successful video call with a grandchild provides the motivation that lectures about staying current can’t.
Should I set up all their passwords or have them do it?
Do it together. You type while they tell you what password they want, or vice versa. This shared ownership increases the likelihood they’ll remember credentials. Never set up accounts without them present or aware, as this creates dependency rather than independence.
How do I handle it when they’ve been scammed?
Stay calm and supportive. Scammers are sophisticated, and anyone can fall victim. Help them secure compromised accounts by changing passwords and enabling two-factor authentication. Contact their bank if financial information was shared. Report the scam to the FTC at reportfraud.ftc.gov. Use this as a teaching moment to identify red flags in future communications without making them feel foolish.
What’s the best way to teach parents who are completely tech beginners?
Start with one device and one task they care about accomplishing. Build from there incrementally. Use consistent terminology and avoid technical jargon. Let them physically perform actions on the device rather than doing it for them. Expect to repeat instructions multiple times without frustration. Celebrate every small success to build confidence.
Should I buy my parents new devices if their current ones are old?
Not necessarily. Older devices often run more slowly and lack modern features, but they’re familiar. If their device functions adequately for their needs, focus on optimizing what they have. However, if the device is truly obsolete (can’t run current apps or receives no security updates), upgrading makes sense. When upgrading, choose user-friendly options with good customer support.
How can I help parents who live far away?
Remote access software is essential. Install TeamViewer or Chrome Remote Desktop on their devices so you can troubleshoot from anywhere. Schedule regular video calls to check in on tech issues before they become major problems. Mail them printed reference guides for common tasks. Consider hiring local tech support for complex issues that require physical presence.
What if I don’t know the answer to their tech questions?
It’s perfectly fine to say “I don’t know, but let’s figure it out together.” Search for answers online while they watch. This models the problem-solving process and shows that you don’t have all the answers instantly either. Looking up solutions together is a valuable teaching moment.
How do I prevent them from downloading malicious apps or clicking dangerous links?
Enable built-in security features on their devices. On iPhones, they can only download apps from the App Store, which has strict vetting. On Android devices, ensure Google Play Protect is enabled and discourage downloading apps from outside the Google Play Store. Install reputable antivirus software on computers. Most importantly, teach skepticism about unsolicited messages asking them to click links or download anything.
Should I manage certain accounts for them remotely?
For critical accounts like banking or healthcare, help them learn to manage these independently for as long as possible. However, having access to help in emergencies is reasonable if they’re comfortable with it. Always respect privacy and autonomy. Some families share a password manager with specific shared vaults for accounts that might need family access in emergencies.
What’s the best device for elderly parents?
iPads often work well for seniors due to their intuitive interface, large screen size, and excellent accessibility features. However, the best device is the one that fits into their existing ecosystem. If all their family members use Android, adding an Apple device creates compatibility hassles. Consider devices with longer battery life and robust customer support options.
How do I protect their privacy and data security?
Enable strong passwords or biometric authentication on all devices. Turn on two-factor authentication for important accounts, especially email, banking, and anything with payment information. Explain that they should never share passwords or security codes with anyone claiming to be from tech support. Update privacy settings on social media to limit what’s publicly visible. Consider setting up automatic backups to cloud storage so important photos and documents aren’t lost if a device fails.
Conclusion: Technology as Connection, Not Frustration
Helping your parents with their tech over the holidays represents more than just troubleshooting devices or teaching button sequences. You’re enabling continued independence, safety, and meaningful connection with family members near and far. The time you invest now in patient teaching prevents countless frustrating phone calls throughout the year and helps your parents remain engaged with the modern world on their own terms.
Remember that your parents once spent years teaching you everything from tying shoes to driving a car. They repeated instructions endlessly with patience and celebration of small victories. Now you have the opportunity to return that gift of patient teaching in a domain where you have expertise.
Technology should enhance life, not complicate it. By focusing on the tools and features that genuinely improve your parents’ daily experience, you create positive associations with technology rather than fear and frustration. Celebrate every successful video call, every photo they share independently, every bill they pay online without assistance.
The best part? These aren’t just tech support sessions. They’re quality time together, working toward a shared goal. Years from now, your parents won’t remember whether you helped them with iOS 18 or Android 15. They’ll remember that you cared enough to sit with them, teach them patiently, and empower them to stay connected with the people and activities they love.
This holiday season, give your parents the gift of tech confidence. Your patience, clear instruction, and genuine support will keep giving throughout the year as they use these new skills to enrich their daily lives and maintain precious connections with family.
